Charley Rosen on the Magic

Charley Rosen writes for FoxSports and is famous for having his nose up Phil Jackson's butt. Most of his writing is pretty negative about anyone (except of course Phil.)

FOXSports.com - NBA- Magic may not be playoff pretenders

Here's what the Magic need to do to battle their way into the playoffs:

Accelerate Howard's development by inventing an anti-Golden Pond pill. Force Cato to undergo electric shock therapy, or else ditch him and find another mean-eyed big. Put Battie on a mega-high fat-only diet. Stretch Francis on the rack so that he'll be long enough to be a legit two-guard. Cut the string that attaches the ball to Nelson's hands. Arrange for Kasun to undergo sensitivity training. And above all, keep Hill off of the operating table.